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I've found my new savior and prophet. After reading my friend Eli's blog covering the explotations of the white man in a yellow world I think I've decided to give my blog another go. I can't let the whities get a leg up on us in this digital self-centered need to be heard. So with that some updates are probably in order.

Things lost over the 2 years since the last entry:
- 1 pair of glasses
- 1 shitty studio apt in the UWS
- 1 korean gf
- 2 sets of keys
- 30% of my overall self-respect
- black hair

Things gained over the 2 years since the last entry:
- 1 flat screen LCD TV...hooray!
- 2 bd apartment in the E Village furnished with 1 vietnamese roommate
- 1 kick ass jewish gf...or is that 1 jewish gf that kicks my ass?
- 1 new job..."when i grow up i want to climb my way up into middle management" :S
- gray hair

So I'm still here in NYC and am still somehow not jaded by it. Though I think I've become slightly more impatient....look Minnesota tourist lady...chatting with your friends 4 abreast in the middle of the sidewalk is not ok.....MOVE! It's been just over 3.5 years since I've been here and this city still seems to amaze me. With my last job I got opportunities to travel to Australia, Europe, Barbados and ghetto ass parts of Mexico City and no matter where I went I always had a smile as soon as I popped out of the Holland Tunnel back into the city.

Anyhow look for more updates as I need some sort of outlet for people to listen to me as my current gf has smartly turned a deaf ear to my innate ramblings.

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Yeah...so I'm a big flake. What is this, attempt number 7432? Alright, in the wise words of Alabama...give me one more shot. That's right suckas...Alabama. They rock. Deal with it.

So after the world tour of Ben I became officially burnt out on life. Work, eating, going out and especially blogging all went out the window. On my new list of priorities were sleeping and tv. I've since come out of my vegitative state. Looking out my window winter is officially here. For my friends out west winter is about as much fun as a bush push into a thorn infested shrub but add bee stings in your face and ice picks in your testicles.

Minus the bees and ice picks it's shaping up to be a good winter. my friend marcy has decided to come out as the next shooter at the greatest craps table of all time...nyc. it's nice to have a piece of home out here....now if i can figure out how to get teriyaki madness to franchise out here then i'm set for life. in addition to mahr-see movin out here a good hunk of seattle is coming out here for nye this year which is shaping up to be dangerous....i gotta get prepared. i'm out...off to the store...let's see, duct tape...check, advil...check, arm sling...check, bail money...check...anybody know where I can get 100 lbs of packing peanuts and an elephant gun? just trying to be ready that's all.

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so I hit up JFK after an all nighter with tuan and wolf. upon arriving at my gate for my flight to barbados i look around and realize that i was one of those kids...doing there own thing, one of those kids who isn't the same. the flight was to barbados with a stop in miami. so between all the cubans, dominicans and barbados folks (bajans i think) i was definitely odd man out. regardless i slept the entire way and now here i am somewhere at the bottom of this island.

i'm hot, stinky and tired and my room isn't ready. so now i'm sitting here in the business "centre" and not "center" typing away. stuipd commonwealth nation.

i have zero cell phone coverage so if you want to hit me up either email me or hit me up here.

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Seriously. Tell me somebody lost their job after giving the "go ahead" for this genius marketing campaign.

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So I'm here in the office today to get some work done. I usually work from home on my days off but since I've still yet to set up anything in my new apt, attempting to get any work done from the comforts of my bed usually end up with me falling asleep on my laptop with the following text written in my reports:

asdfasdfafdsfjdlsfdfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

....so here I am today.

As I'm sitting in my cage I overhear Mr. Important talking to Ms. I Hate My Admin Assistant Job about how "he really likes the snowboarding one". Ms. Hater then exclaims..."I love that one but I really like hockey one."

My curiousity gets to me as I hear the sounds of ruffling through boxes. I decide to do a recon mission and using my asian stealth sneak by them. I soon find the two of them going through a box of these which represent all that I hate about working for a corporation. I assume Mr Important was referring to this one and Ms Hater was referring to this one.

I need to quit and open my bar in Costa Rica. You know the one that serves nothing but 40s and has monkeys dancing on the bar. Think of a simian Coyote Ugly.

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i'm back. mucho apologios for the tiempo since the last posto but a lot has happenedo. so let's start from the top:

- i've moved. here is the location of my new shanty. Notice the large pasture of plus signs a few blocks above me. this is where unproductive mathematical operations go to pasture.
- i used to live in a mousehole sized apartment and mathematically my new places is much better: shanty=(2*mousehole size)^proximity of fun bars.
- moving from shanty to mousehole required a total of 5 flights down and 4 flights up. this caused an initial thought of dread of moving large boxes of things or large pieces of furniture. this dread was swept away eventually by the much more difficult decision that I simply did not need these "things" anymore. much to the disappointment of tyler durden i realized that i had become my khakis...and mine were pleated dockers.

*tangent: the social hub of my block was an older gentleman named Richard as he knew everyone that walked up and down our street. Richard was as far as i could tell originally from Philly, still works throwing freight into trucks at night and has probably the sickest pythons/guns/whatever that i have ever seen on a man in his late 60s/early 70s. they go well with his thick accent which ends up translating sentences such as "he's not a very nice man" into "fuggedit....the guysss a fuhkin prick!" upon realizing that i was moving and i was leaving large pieces of furniture in front of our apt bldgs hoping somebody would take them, Richard and his sick pythons wanted to make sure the landlords don't get fined cause he was pretty sure nobody would take them since they were so large.
his solution: move them down a couple buildings so that the "fuhkin prix" that fired his friend who was the "supah" for 10 years could deal with it. we dragged the furniture in front of their door, walked away innocentl, admired our handiwork and said our solemn goodbyes. tks for the advice, the muscle and the good times Richard.


back to today....so here i am in Seattle waiting for my friends to get off work. i've got out here earlier in the week and have had a great time every day. here's the brief rundown:
Day 1: let arturo and josh move in while i finish up some work at bauhaus. realize that what i was drinking was finally coffee and not the armpit sweat that harry the deli owner around the corner from me used to pawn off as coffee. god bless coffee snobs. end up shoving large amounts of pizza, wings and tim's jalepeno's into my stomach topped off with pbr's from Lindas. the royal rumble in my stomach has started.

Day 2: wake up to arturo waking me up every 15 minutes with pleas of "yo dude, uhhhhhh want to help me move my bed?" this took about 9 attempts to wake me but it worked.

quote of the morning from arturo's new roommate Cobra: "uhhhh....are there ANY other heterosexual men that live in this house???" (setup: cobra discovers not 1, but 2 hair straightening irons in the house each belonging to the other roommates Arturo and Josh).

Day 2 cont: went to bumbershoot and met everyone there. got there a little late for the decemberists but watched a rousing good show. the day was spent making fun of everyone on stage (which brought ahe into a much higher light to me as i realized i've been out-assholed). for further details on the game please refer to bailee or ahe's blogs as these two broads are the quickest bloggers in the west and leave me with little to talk about. Further details of this day can be found there also. *note the following items were added to the stomach royal rumble: 1 corn dog, 1 hui hui chicken, 1 ear of roasted corn, 1 meat on a stick and a tag team of tatertots.

Day 3: Dinner with Seth, Eli, Lisa and Ronin (i know your name is Roshin but i have no idea how to spell it and Ronin makes me think of car chases with Robert Deniro and that makes me smile). we proceeded to clear out an entire japanese restaraunt and eat an entire school of fish. i also learned that neither lisa or i can be quiet for more then 5 minutes. it's a physical impossibility. fiesta night at arturo's followed which was supposed to revolve around a screening of "blood in, blood out", a great mexican epic tale. we all know what this led to...patron, reheated nachos, tecates and a lot of yelling at the tv. i also realized that there is no more beautiful of a scene then watching 8 good friends of yours engrossed in probably one of the finest movies ever made that nobody knows about...and i quote: "I don't want his porkchop....I want his life!!!"
*Note if anybody wants to watch a much more superior and much more Korean version of this rent Chingu (Engrish translation: Friend).

Day 4: Degenerateness with Seth. Went and played some cards and won big. unfortunately seth literally had to win 1 more dollar then me.

Day 5: Sandwiches and PeeBurrs at the Honeyhole for my psuedo last night here. i had to explain to bailee my utter disappointment at my sandwich and proceed to explain how sandwiches are seattle's white people comfort food while $5 teriyaki and rice in a shitty styrofoam container are seattle's asian people comfort food. then bailee had to throw the vietnamese sandwich (the tastiest sandwich in the world) in my face and my entire arguement was counterfitted. Bailee 1, Ben 0.

Day 6: Couldn't catch the last train out of Seattle to PDX so we're back to the present and one more night in ol Seattle. this my friends is what we in the industry like to call "an encore".

next stops on the Ben Lim Self-Loathing Tour:
9/10 Portland, OR
9/12 New York, NY
9/17 Bridgetown, Barbados
9/23 New York, NY
9/25 Amsterdam, Holland
10/2 New York, NY
10/4 Philadelphia, PA
10/10 Dallas, TX

I need a roadie.

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